=*a.r.i.a.n.e=*

just some points to ponder..about the campaign for real beauty..hmm.. perhaps the latest phenomena is that there are many girls going on diet just for ..’conformity’? and having low self esteem? hmm.. i admit i maybe at times munching only a piece of bread for the whole day.. but sometimes.. i would also be super BHB.. telling my friends( vvvv close friends) that im growing prettier day by day.. and rendering them giving that ’shut up’ look…& thiking im super slim and ended up munching the entire bar of choc at one go …hmm…dependin on my mood..anyway came across this cute verse..round is a shape.. so if u r round u r in shape too!

God had created us so uniquely.. imagine..we are the same yet diff.. born with 46 chromosomes (izzit correct? my bio’s kinda rusty)..2 eyes.. 1 mouth..1 face…yet all of us look so different..even among siblings or twins..imagine..since time immemorial, there are already billions of homosapiens being born.. and none of us look identical. how amazing! or maybe there was another fella who look or wiill look identical..some 5000years ago or after!…haha..

well.. i tink what really made us ‘humane’ is that we can never be contented with what we have..not being complacent..but contented..im not exceptional.. for example.. i was born with nice straight hair.. but went to perm it.. friends ard me having curly hair wants to straighten it.. those who are born fair yearns to be tanned and vice versa..

haha…anyway, now i miss my straight hair…

in summary…beauty lies in the eye of the beholder..

purest of pain - son by four.. chanced upon it today…a song so sweet..and i loved..cos i think he sang it with so much feelings, emotions .. and it really melted my heart..it goes..

I’m sorry I didn’t mean to call but I couldn’t fight it I guess I was weak and couldn’t even hide it and so I surrender just to hear your voice I know how many times I said I’m gonna to live with out you and maybe someone else is standing there beside you but there’s something baby that you need to know that deep inside me I feel like I’m dying I have to see you it’s all that I’m asking. Vida, give me back my fantasies the courage that I need to live the air that I breathe carino mio, my world becomes so empty my day’s are so cold and lonely and each night I taste the purest of pain. I wish I could tell you I’m feeling better every day that it didn’t hurt me when you walked away but to tell you the truth I can’t find my way and deep inside me I feel like I’m dying I have to see you it’s all that I’m asking. Vida, give me back…

i always firmly believe in the proper enunciation of words..perhaps the reason being in the convant school for 4 yrs where our teachers were very particular about the english language..

i reckon there would be misunderstandings if the message got across is not clear enough..

here’s an examle..

few years back, i was buying some stuff from a mama shop below my home.. and i overheard a conversation between a child and an adult.. apparently the adult was some inquisitive aunty trying to get some financial status of her neighbour’s family..

aunty:"your house got meat or not?" (i think she meant ‘maid’)

child:"have..my mummy everyday go market buy wan..my house fridge also got.."

adult: no ah.. i mean meat..meat ah.. got meat (then the ‘meat’ somehow transform into ‘meaad’) help you clean house not?"

i think i was quite mean to giggle in silence..but this kind of misinterpretation is harmless.. not as bad as when i was in sec sch.. my form teacher was absent for almost 2 weeks.. and we were wondering why.. and sister jo came into our class to explain the reason for her absence..

"class.. mrs heng will not be around for another week.. because her husband is sick.."

"sick? for so long? what happen to her husband?"

"oh..(showing a sad face).. her husband got syphillis.." (she speaks real soft)

"HUH???!!!"

"(still very softly..) syyphillissss.."

then i remember turning to my friend..oh my gosh.. mrs heng so poor thing.. she’s such a nice lady and her husband got ssssyyyyphillis..

the ‘rumours’ went around until mrs heng came back to explain that her husband had SLIPPED DISC and went for an operation…….

the chinese new year is ard the corner and i saw santa tansform into chai shen ye as days go by.. and one of my new year must-do is to have a hair cut.. no matter how unneccesary it is.. cos i believe in snappinf off ‘old roots’..

hmm.. supposed to set a date with my friend to have a hair cut party together, but apparently , time doesnt permit this to materialise…furthermore..i prefer to cut my hair when i think i gotta feeling right..haha..

as usual.. i went back to my dearest ivan..my favourite hairstylist since i was 17…i still remember i stepped into <storm> that very day with my pony tailed hair in my uniform then.. feeling apprehensive..the fact that i said " i trust you" rendered him motivated i reckon.. and i got a fantastic cut in return.. time flies.. and he’s still that quiet yet funky looking guy that i first knew.. with a tint of feminine character..you know.. like the more subtle and quiet version of david gan…

everytime he tries a new style for me, i would give it a gamble.. more often than not, i would leave the salon gratified.. and coming back for the same style until im tired of it or he’ll persuade me for something else..

i sat under the steamer for hours.. wash cut blow dye perm treatment.. i sat under his scissors and heater for 4 hours.. and washed my hair for 4 x.. phew..then under the steamer..

after what seemed an eternity, i knew i had the right stylist from the start.. ivan is still the best! =)

friends are like waves.. they come and go.. however, there are also some friends who will stay and stand by you.. support you and give you the truest comments.. even those that you won’t want to hear..and leave foot prints in ur heart..

i guess i am like any other waves in any body’s life.. but for every friendship that i establish, i would try my best to maintain the friendship .. length does not matter, so long as we can hit off well..

there are also some freinds around .. whom i don’t even know can be considered as friends… some are obviously making use of you..

there’s one particular friend of mine, he’s really very smart.. a dean list student.. and he confided in me that he could not find many true and real friends in school..everyone (almost) gets close to him because he’s intelligent, because he can coach them in their work, and because he’ s of use to them.. well.. this is life..

this is not uncommon.. this happens to me as well.. i thought i could proudly say my friends are true.. because im not intelligent enough to get people to sponge on me..neither am i rich.. haha..but recently something strange happen to me.. it was apparently that i was no longer of use to this freind of mine.. and thus.. a vast change in attitude.. (some matters that i discovered later)…well.. this is life.. there are a few billion people in this world.. made up of different people..with different characters.. we cant expect everyone to like ourselves.. someone out there may not like you.. another would.. hahah..

life is short.. (or maybe not).. people come people go.. im very blessed to have friends around me..staying close to me since primary school.. since sec sch.. since college days.. and i thank god for them.. =) friends that make one another feel comfortable..and be ourselves..my best friend sent me this song few mths back.. and i was reallly touched to hear this:

第一次见面看你不太顺眼
谁知道后来关系那么密切
我们一个像夏天一个像秋天
却总能把冬天变成了春天
你拖我离开一场爱的风雪
我背你逃出一次梦的锻炼
遇见一个人然后生命全改变
原来不是恋爱才有的情节
如果不是你我不会相信
朋友比情人还死心塌地
就算我忙恋爱把你冷冻结冰
你也不会恨我只是骂我几句
如果不是你我不会确定
朋友比情人更懂得倾听
我的胸怀志意我的有口无心
我离不开darling更离不开你
你拖我离开一场爱的风雪
我背你逃出一次梦的锻炼
遇见一个人然后生命全改变
原来不是恋爱才有的情节
如果不是你我不会相信
朋友比情人还死心塌地
就算我忙恋爱把你冷冻结冰
你也不会恨我只是骂我几句
如果不是你我不会确定
朋友比情人更懂得倾听
我的胸怀志意我的有口无心
我离不开darling更离不开你
你了解我所有得意的东西
拆穿我留些意怕我忘形
你知道我所有丢脸的事情
却为我的美好形像保密
如果不是你我不会相信
朋友比情人还死心塌地
就算我忙恋爱把你冷冻结冰
你也不会恨我只是骂我几句
如果不是你我不会确定
朋友比情人更懂得倾听
我的胸怀志意我的有口无心
我离不开darling更离不开你

.. really very apt! =)

hmm.. well.. it’s alrady been week 3.. and i’m still sinking myself in langour.. feeling the moentum is still very slow..or am i just showing non-chalance since it’s my last sem in NUS.. hahah.. well.. anyway, it’s the same old boring 8am lecture..her speech are given in ’stanzas’..she’ll talk..and pause..and talk.. and pause..i looked left & right.. both my friends are in slumberland..*wah* and thus, inevitably rendered my thoughts to run.. and my eyes to wander..

as i ’scan’ round the LT… there were indeed more girls than guys.. and i looked at the ‘look’ they portray.. and i came up some innocuous ‘hypothesis’..ya.. i would say.. a spectrum of gals ..

there’s a good balance of fair and tan skinned girls.. and here’s my point of view on the relationship of hair (colour) vs skin colour:

if one is tanned and her hair is lightly coloured, she gives the healthy look..but is she’s tanned and her hair is black, she’ll look un-chinese..and pretty normal looking..

however, if she’s fair and her hair is black, she look like an authentic asian..but if she’s fair and her hair is lightly coloured, will appear quite ah lian..

and if one’s complexion is rather tan, she’ll give a very sporty look..but if she’s too thin, she look undernourished…if round is the shape, then one would appear unkempt..

and if one is fair, and slim, woo.. she’s quite a beauty then, but it’ll be better if she’s on the plump side…as the saying goes 白白胖胖。。 hahah..chubby…hee hee..and if she’s skinny, will look pale and ill..

well.. anyway, the above mentioned is neither adulation for anybody, nor am i trying to heap vituperations at anyone..just giving some very neutral comments during some very boring lectures.. from my point of view.. *yawn

met up with my college buddies.. and it’s pretty long since we last met with one another… about 1 yr plus i suppose? hmm.. anyway, we finally get to have a meal .. and chill out at cosy bay..

cosy bay, i should say, is a pretty cool place to chill out, hang out with good friends, to watch soccer and for a romantic date..cosy bay is located at kallang basin ( i think..im not very good at directions).. somewhere near indoor stadium..cosy bay is a restaurant cum pub, and the stuff there are quite affordable, taking into consideration the setting, ambience, location as well as the food..

before you enter the restaurant, you will be greeted by a very romantic bridge.. like a grand entrance to welcome you .. and when you enter the restaurant, that would be the ‘basement’ level, where you order your food and all… and there’s a screen for you to enjoy soccer and play with the game gadgets there .. i prefer breezy place, so usually i woulld go all the way up to the 4th or 5th level via the spiral staircase.. where the scenery is the best and the best part to sabotage the waiters.. to make them climb all the way up.. muah hahah.. well.. that’s me…

woo… seeing the sun set, with good music, good food, picturesque scenery and compnay of friends… erm.. guys… that’s a pretty good dating place.. *wink

we had rosemary chicken, grilled dory and bbq chicken.. yummy… the dessert is a bit ex.. but it’s very specially made.. cool…

well.. a picture speaks a thousand words..there it is..

when i was much much younger, ambition to me seemed a humongous word.. as in it sounded really far away.. like 10 years down the road what are you going to be? but now.. hahah…’ambition’ doesn’t really apply much to me now…my fellow friends, do you realise that people around you no longer ask you ‘what your ambition?’ … it insinuates.. you are no longer have the luxury of time to think about what is your job..in the … erm.. future…for me.. it’s a matter of having my ‘ambition’ materialised in … 4 months time…

when i was in primary 1, i remember that was the time i came across this big word..’AMBITION… A-M-B-I-T-I-O-N’ becuase it was some new vocab from some stupid squirrel PETS course book..yellow colour english text..and i remember telling mrs rosnah i wanted to be a florist.. cos the cartoon gal (as a florist) looked very pretty..

then it slowly evolved to a librarian around pri 4, becuase i saw this librarian chopping books at the counter..seemed quite a fun job..scan and chop, chop and scan the books.. then, now, the libraries became fully self service with automation..

then, i wanted to be an air stewardess.. but realised i didnt have the assets to become one…then, through the influence of my family and school, i wanted to be a teacher.. very passionately, and i remember writing that essay on that and gotten quite good grades ( cos in favour of teachers mah..haha).. it persevered for quite sometime.. until secondary 4, when i realised my interest for the sciences grew..and wanted to be a doctor.. but come on.. i faced it.. my passion for that was stymied when i didnt get into triple science in college..

now that im reading chemistry , i ve decided to be a chemist now concomitant to maturity .. shld the future allows me.. hee… though it had never been my ambition, but it’s now some job that i yearn.. and i dream of… but i think ‘chemist’ was not the vocab in some english texts…maybe they can add that in too…

it had been quite an unpleasant day for me.. down with bad throat and having tolerating some nonsense from some people..im feeling quite tired after a long’s day lecture.. feeling feverish and the so called formidable streps didnt cure my throat..wanted very much to sleep.. but ended up chatting with LT at her hall before going for my 6pm bahasa indo intro..

met up with one or two of my last sem’s classmates and pretty happy to see them again.. but what surprised me most was i met my secondary school chinese orchestra senior.. and junior.. after asking "siapa namanya".. and the name sort of telly with some faces somewhere i saw sometime ago..

"hi!! siapa namanya?"

"nama saya peiying.."

"erm.. were you from SAc?"

"ya.. u from CO wan right?"

"YEAH!!…u from yangqin correct? im from cello base wan..you know jac? she’s in front..blah blah blah.."

woo.. that’s how we rekinded our relationship..hahah..exchanged our numbers and tuff.. wah.. really been a long time since i last met my CO seniors..being in the CO family in SAC had left me great impressions..

time flies..almost 10 years…

yeah.. i remember i had a fun time in orchestra.. i’m known as the yangqin gal.. and i remember needed the help of fellow seniors to help me carry the huge and heavy instrument…and how we worked hard for SYF and having CCAs on wed and sat.. i remember how fierce was our instructor.. and how we had so much fun.. haiz.. come to think of it.. i was really stupid to leave the orchestra..

i remember the orchestra was full of music..every section fine tuning their own instruments.. and how we fear that cantankerous mr syed.. the fine arts director..hahah.. and i remember being scolded like hell from him… ….. for quitting the orchestra..to work with the editorial board peacefully..

i remember i was one of the youngest committee member in the orchestra.. and then rumours was going around that our president was ‘apple polishing’ either me or another girl to be the president.. i was very stressed up with the entire episode and decided to backout…it was so funny and silly looking back.. why would all of us love to fight for ‘power’ in this school…like being the prefect, head prefect, presidents, office bearers, etc.. like ‘jin zhi yu nie’..haha..

i miss the orchestra.. but didnt regret leaving orchestra to learn new things with the editorial board.. i remember hopping around because i was sort of the ‘part time percussionist’ and handling the admin stuff and actively participating in the orchestra activities..

hmm.. then i lost contact with my fellow orchestra friends.. i remember they celebrated my birthday in the canteen before..and how we made fun of each other during practice sessions.. and how we tune and tune the instrument until they were really out of tune.. and ended up changing the strings… so funny…

i wonder how are they now?

today’s my granny’s 90th birthday…as usual, like any other sundays, we have all my relatives snuggling in my granny’s home.. except.. more food, more ‘aunties’ in the kitchen, more kids, and 2 brithday cake..well..the usual yummy emi’s durian cake & a very chocolaty cake.. btoh printd with a ’shou’ character.. longevity that is..

it felt like new year, because all the food which was served appeared to be sumptous..my granny’s speciality: piggy soup with lotsa pepper.. i dont know how to describe that.. it’s a passed down traditional secret recipe since time immemmorial..my first aunt had taken over the pot now, erm, didnt taste as good but the taste is still there.. hahah.. the kids were running around as usual, and i dunno why there were also kids from the neighbouring unit…well, granny’s neighbours extended their congratulations too…

this year’s a bit different though, cousin adrian brought his wife along.. yeah.. his wife now.. and he was wearing a cute tee printed "i drink, my honey drives".. haha.. and i made fun of them with cousin’s chauvanistic character..cousin -in-law was really fun to be with as well.. and the whole lot of us was so nonsensical..the adults were talking about cakes when my cousin, RY started to tease my aunty.. saying she didnt know how to make cakes and only love to make ‘choc cake’…nvm, i shant go on further, gross.. haha..

my granny’s really old and is getting more ‘fragile’.. her smile was ever cheery , except her actions now are really very very slow…she’s already the great grand mum for my little cousins … hmm..when’s cousin adrian going to be dad then? and waiting for cousin RY to quickly get married as she gets fatter..hahah! oopx!

p/s:

something interesting to share..the children of the LIM family has the middle character in the name which belongs to an ancestral poem..so if one were to trace the middle character of the names, one will be able to realise it actually came from the poem.. so as to identify which descendant one belongs to..